What I Learned From Mi Madre

Me, Stace, and Ang took my mom to Dairy Queen for Mother's Day.. there is nothing like a good blizzard to celebrate. :) I also had my mom model with my purchases for the month. Some of you have been asking what I ended up buying this month.. and my mom was my model. :) Yah, I know I said that I would only get one thing.. but yah, I suck with my mula !!























As the day approached where we honor and think of our mom's... my emotions were bittersweet. I love my mom, yet because of experiences that I have had with her.. I was also hurt by her tremendously. These two emotions coexist within me and each battles the other on a continuous basis. When these emotions first happened four or so years ago.. I did not know how to deal with them.. their was not enough of me to handle what they entailed. Well, in the four years that I have had this inner battle, I can say that both are still there.. but love peeks his head in my heart more often than pain. Love.. grasps my soul.. instead of pain clutching it and dropping me on my butt. I didn't start winning this battle on my own.. My Savior, family, and friends have all been their watching on the sidelines.. or at times actually fighting the pain for me !! I thank them for that. But, most importantly love has begun to win because of my mom. Interesting how the one that caused the pain, is also the one that can heal it. What I have learned these four years.. is that I have to focus on the good my mom did for me... which is a lot. Like... cutting off my crusts on my sandwiches for my lunch, taking me on mega shopping trips, always listening to me.. really listening, and being a shoulder to cry on, making me laugh, rubbing my forehead to put me asleep. Her love for me has superseded the pain.. and I truly believe that it will eventually subside it. The pain will be won, to never get up again and face me. I am lucky.. lucky to have a mom that went through the pain she did.. and yet still loved me and made me who I am. You see in order to know love.. truly know it, we must truly know pain. My mom.. has taught me both, and I thank her and love her for it !! Happy Madre Day mi madre!!